I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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