Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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