This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
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