She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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