my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
