Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
There r osticjed everywhere
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
