i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
