I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
