I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Pappa wants mamma naked
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
