A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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