How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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