I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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