It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
