spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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