i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
