Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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