lets start a swedish sibling band together
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I think I have vodka in my lungs
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
