that's an acceptable place to lick
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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