So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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