That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
