I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize