We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Randomize
