Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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