i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
