i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
