My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
And then he peed in my hair
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