hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Let's get the cat blown out
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
