Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
