So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
