I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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