Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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