it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
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