I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize