Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
