Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
