Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
