This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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