I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
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