i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
