Porn is love you can see.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
