I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
