Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
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