living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
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