Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
