he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Dick very happy bro
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