? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Randomize
