i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
