I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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