His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
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