i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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