I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Randomize