i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
