I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
